Touch Me and See
This homily was first given at a mass that was part of Call To Action Metro New York’s annual meeting on Sunday April 14th, 2024.
“Look at my hands and my feet, that it is I myself. Touch me and see.” In today’s Gospel Jesus comes to the disciples leading with his full humanity. The disciples, like so often in the Gospel, don’t get it. They do not yet fully understand that Jesus is Lord, raised from the dead. Jesus wants them to understand that this is not some trick of the light or supernatural event – he is really here with us, in body, in flesh.
This recalls also the Gospel of last week on Divine Mercy Sunday. John recounts how Thomas Didymus does not believe that Jesus is returned – he is not dead, he is alive. It takes that personal encounter with Jesus for Thomas to be transformed. With grace Jesus invites him to touch the wounds in his hands and his side. In this way, Jesus says to him, engage with me. Engage with my full self – my humanity, my pain, and my resurrection.
Many of us are familiar with Caravaggio’s famous painting “The Incredulity of Saint Thomas”. It captures the moment Thomas discovers Christ’s wounds and his skepticism is conquered by revelation. In 2017, photographer Elisabeth Ohlson Wallin created an image inspired by this depiction for her exhibit titled id:TRANS. In the image, a young transgender man in an unbuttoned shirt invites his friends to look at his chest, showing them is gender-affirming top surgery scars. The young man’s hand holds one of his friend’s fingers to the truth revealed by his body, just as Jesus does with Thomas’ hand in Caravaggio’s painting. In this way the young man says to his friend, engage with me. Engage with my full self, my transgender self. My humanity, my pain, and my resurrection.
As people of God, we are invited to grow in understanding and spiritual maturity over time, both in our individual lives as well as collectively over the course of generations. In this way, God gradually unveils deeper insights and truths as human understanding evolves and historical circumstances change. We learn more about God’s nature and God’s plan for humanity through the Scriptures, yes, but also through encountering God in our lives, in the world, and with one another.
This past Monday, the Dicastery for the Doctrine of the Faith published a new document titled Dignitas Infinita, Latin for human dignity. The document purports to emphasize the inherent, God-given dignity of every human person – a dignity that is intrinsic and inviolable. It makes mention of conditions that are contrary to this dignity, including poverty, war, and the marginalization of people with disabilities. However, Dignitas Infinita would also have us count transgender rights and reproductive justice among those travesties. This is a betrayal of LGBTQ people and women, particularly those of us who are Catholic.
Dignitas Infinita shows a profound lack of engagement with the lived experiences and the spiritual journeys of transgender people. And make no mistake, for transgender people of faith the journey of transition is not just a social one, but also a spiritual one. Transgender Catholics, like all other Catholics, ask themselves “who am I, and what is God’s plan for me?”
I have been blessed by opportunities to know and converse with transgender Catholics. My friend Max Kuzma, who was one of our guests at CTA Metro NY’s webinar last month, loves to share how embracing his identity as a transgender man opened him up further to the mercy of God’s love, allowing him to claim more firmly his identity in Christ. At a retreat I went to recently, I had the opportunity to meet Maddie Marlett, a transgender woman who is an up-and-coming leader in Dignity USA. In response to Dignitas Infinita, Maddie writes for Dignity USA: “my journey to self-acceptance was through realizing my self-worth as God’s creation. […] I made one choice and that was to live.” How different would this document have been if only church leaders would open up their hearts, minds, and spirits to journeying with people like Max and Maddie. Instead, they have missed the opportunity to encounter and cherish the diversity of humanity as created by God in God's image.
The LGBTQ community and our allies are not gripped by a dangerous, death-dealing “gender theory” debunked by scientists. The Vatican actually is, in their insistence that gender identity be limited to these rigid, binary labels we impose on one another as fallible human beings. Transgender Catholics show us that gender identity is a beautiful part of the human experience that each of us personally co-creates with God.
Transgender rights are a life issue. Without acknowledging transgender people’s humanity, without protecting their place in civil society, without providing gender affirming care, we expose them to violence. Without welcoming transgender people in the Church, without celebrating their gifts, we compromise their ability to flourish as the full selves God created them to be. Let us pray that the leaders of the Church and we who are church may have the wisdom to engage with transgender people as their full selves – their humanity, their pain, and their resurrection. Here with us, in body, in flesh. Let us heed the call of Jesus and be transformed – “look at my hands and my feet, that it is I myself. Touch me and see.”